1. A lot of children have short attention spans.
- Children, especially toddlers and teens, pay little to no attention to what their parents are saying, especially if they are being reprimanded for misbehavior or for making a mistake. Their little minds wander to avoid feelings of shame or embarrassment.
2. They complain that parents talk over their heads.
- Some parents have a tendency to overestimate the comprehension skills of their children, leading to more misunderstanding and confusion. Although we shouldn’t treat the children as innocent, mindless beings, we should also keep in mind that they are just starting to learn the difference between right and wrong. Don’t talk about the hungry children in China when they don’t even have an interest on what’s going on with politics and economics of the world yet. Let’s reserve that discussion for when they are in college.
3. They say that parents don’t understand children’s thoughts, feelings and views.
- This is a common comeback from teenagers whenever they are in an argument with their parents. Teenagers, in particular, develop a sense of mentality that the world is against them and that anything forbidding them to do anything they want is their enemy – such as their parents and other forms of authority (teacher, police, etc.). This mentality is brought about by emerging feelings of insecurity, the need to fit in, growing ambitions, and their expanding knowledge of the world around them. In short, this phase is just a part of growing up and parents must realize this so that they won’t develop or harness feelings of rejection or resentment regarding their children. In order to control a situation such as this, parents must listen more to their children’s opinions and give them a little more trust and independence.
4. They regard their parents’ communication as critical, judgmental and nagging.
- As children grow up, they find that the people they are most comfortable talking with are their peers, or people in their age group. The best thing that a parent can do at this time is to be supportive of the child’s goals and ambitions. Helping the child turn angst into passion not only brings the child closer to his parents but can also greatly contribute to the cultivation of the child’s talents and skills.
5. They associate their parents with constantly being told what to do.
- As I had mentioned above, they start to feel like parents are more of an authority that they should rebel against rather than family that they can rely on.
- How To Talk To Parents About Gentle Alternatives To Spanking (touchstonez.com)
- 5 Decisions Teenagers Make That Damage Their Future (followthenarrowroad.com)
- Parenting (marvaseaton.wordpress.com)
- Raising Children Badly (socyberty.com)